Time is money.
We have built an entire culture around that idea. Time is a resource to be managed, protected, measured, and optimized. Every minute should produce something. Every meeting should have an outcome. Every interaction should move us closer to a result.
And because time is money, we’re constantly trying to do more with less time.
I am no exception. I skim emails while on zoom calls. I glance at my phone while having an in person conversation. Sometimes with my boss, sometimes with my child. The urge comes from the desire to get more done.
We go through life having experiences with each other but I wonder how much of them were actually experiencing. Are we present in the experiences or are we just adding to our collection of ill-digested experiences?
Last night my boyfriend went to the hospital to visit a loved one on the same day that he closed a $13M deal. He was stressed and busy and when he left the hospital he couldn’t, for the life of him, remember where he parked his car. He wasn’t present when he parked and so he walked the lengths of the garage until he found it. He wasn’t present when he parked.
He many conversations do you barely remember? Moments we were physically present for but never really participated in.
If you follow my work you’ve heard me talk about the Results Pyramid. The principle is that experiences shape beliefs, beliefs drive actions, and actions produce results. When leaders want different results, their instinct is usually to focus on actions: direct the behavior. But that gets us into the action trap. Instead we must ask ourselves what beliefs are getting in the way of achieving our result and what experiences can I create to change those beliefs?
So here’s the question I’ve been wrestling with:
How can we truly be intentional about experiences if none of us are actually present for the experience?
Will they produce the belief? Probably not.
Consider two leaders who want an employee to believe their contributions matter. Our suggestion is to recognize the employee.
The first walks by and says, “Hey, great job on that presentation yesterday. Really appreciate it!” Then continues down the hallway.
The second finds a moment to stop. She makes eye contact. Slows down. She tells the employee what specifically stood out about the presentation, why it mattered to the team, and what she appreciated about the way they approached it. She gives the employee an opportunity to respond. Maybe she asks what they learned.
Both leaders recognized the employee. Both created an experience.
But the second leader did something more. She made room for the employee to actually have the experience of being valued.
Does that guarantee the employee feels appreciated? Of course not. We can’t control another person’s experience, and trying to do so would be its own leadership problem.
But we can take responsibility for the conditions we create.
That’s the distinction. That’s conscious contact.
Conscious Contact is the intentional practice of being conscious during contact with someone in order to create and protect the space for another person to have an experience we are intending to create.
Conscious because we’re awake to what we’re doing and why.
Contact because we’re doing more than transmitting information or completing an interaction. We’re creating an opportunity really connect.
It’s the difference between exposing someone to an action and making room for an experience.
Think about how often we confuse the two.
We assume that because we communicated the strategy, people experienced clarity. But completing the behavior doesn’t mean we’ve created the conditions for the belief to change.
A leader practicing Conscious Contact doesn’t just ask, “What action do I need to take?” They ask, “What belief is this action meant to create, and how can I create the space for someone to actually experience my intention?”
How do you practice Conscious Contact?
1. Start with the belief, not the behavior.
Before you recognize someone, give feedback, or communicate a decision, ask yourself what belief you hope the interaction might make possible.
If you’re giving feedback, is it the belief that this person is capable of growing? That you care enough to be honest? That mistakes are opportunities to learn?
This changes how you approach the interaction before it even begins.
2. Design the experience, not just the action.
What would make that belief credible?
If you want someone to believe their perspective matters, inviting them to speak isn’t necessarily enough. You might need to ask a thoughtful question, or demonstrate that you’ve seriously considered their thinking.
Put thought into the moment before it begins.
3. Protect the space for the experience to be had.
This may be the hardest part because it requires resisting our obsession with productivity.
Sometimes the most important thing a leader can do is stop talking. Allow silence. Don’t rush. Resist turning a meaningful moment into a discussion of next steps.
Give the experience room to breathe.
Not every interaction needs to be long or emotional. But the moments that matter need enough attention to register.
4. Surrender the outcome.
You can be intentional about the experience you make possible without becoming attached to how someone receives it.
They may feel appreciated. They may feel uncomfortable. They may not notice anything at all.
That’s theirs.
Your responsibility is to make an authentic offering, not manufacture a response.
Conscious Contact isn’t and shouldn’t be manipulation. It’s the opposite. It’s respecting another person’s experience enough to create space for it without trying to control it.
We are almost always somewhere other than where we are. At least that’s been my experience for most of my life. I’m mentally rehearsing the next conversation. Replaying the last one. Planning, predicting, worrying, optimizing.
Our bodies are in one experience while our minds are already moving on to another. That is the hidden cost of efficiency.
We know our results will improve if we focus on beliefs rather than activity. The irony is that we may be saving time on the very interactions that have the greatest potential to influence what people believe, how they act, and ultimately the results we produce.
Time is money. Create one moment of conscious contact this week and see what value is created.
Elsewhere In Culture
What Happens When the AI You Rely On Goes Down? | Co-Host John Frehse
When technology fails, who takes responsibility? Jessica Kriegel and John Frehse explore what happens when automated systems break down, from a teenager blaming autopilot after a car accident to widespread outages disrupting entire businesses. As organizations become increasingly dependent on technology, leaders face a growing question about accountability when the systems they trust stop working.
Apple:https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/ceo-daily-brief-with-dr-jessica-kriegel/id1725350421?i=1000798153000 Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/episode/2dQR2y24AlwHd9Ge98imFh?si=36ca71e6b9034aac
Why Do the People Who Know AI Best Trust It Least? | Co-Host John Frehse
New SHRM research suggests that employees with the greatest understanding of AI actually rely on it less than their colleagues. Jessica Kriegel and John Frehse unpack why greater expertise may lead to greater skepticism, while sharing how they’re using AI to manage overflowing inboxes, recover missed emails, and rethink productivity.
Apple: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/ceo-daily-brief-with-dr-jessica-kriegel/id1725350421?i=1000798326228 Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/episode/2JF8shgWOUfWtC31p0Tlca?si=4e6f1210e037448c
Why Hackers Target Your People First | Co-Host Dr. Nikesh Aurora
The biggest cybersecurity vulnerabilities often have little to do with technology. Jessica Kriegel and Dr. Nikesh Aurora explore how hackers exploit human psychology through phishing, misplaced trust, and even fake pet photo contests. Their conversation reveals why organizational culture, employee behavior, and the ability to question authority are essential to protecting a business.
Apple: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/ceo-daily-brief-with-dr-jessica-kriegel/id1725350421?i=1000798495507 Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/episode/6YKSqBK40cqVeyJ4UPTFZD?si=d4e289d90278439f
And coming later this week…
Do Your Policies Serve the Company or the Boss?
As work becomes harder to observe, leaders are increasingly turning to surveillance, rigid policies, and tighter oversight. Jessica Kriegel examines the “control reflex,” drawing on Stanford research connecting CEO personality to organizational culture. She challenges leaders to consider whether their policies actually improve performance or simply satisfy their desire for control.
Would Your Company Survive a Major Tech Outage? | Co-Host Dan Streetman
The CrowdStrike outage exposed how quickly a single technology failure can disrupt businesses around the world. Jessica Kriegel and Dan Streetman discuss the risks of relying too heavily on one provider, the importance of real-time visibility, and what organizations can do to strengthen their resilience before the next major disruption.
Last week in The Work Signal, I explored why a winning streak can actually make leaders more dangerous.
Strong results create confidence. But they can also convince executives that because their last bold decision worked, the next one will too.
My CEO, Joe Terry, faced that exact temptation after two successful acquisitions. And his decision surprised me.
Sometimes the smartest move is knowing when to walk away.